7th Philippine National Kendo Tournament and my nidan exam

I thought it was enough

I was contemplating so much if I was gonna share this, since failing my nidan exam isn’t exactly a great moment and do I even deserve to do a long post, but I think there’s so much to celebrate over the weekend.

After getting the results, I approached Akita-sensei, I bowed deeply and said I’m sorry. He told me “daijobu” to which I immediately replied “I’ll try harder”, and he nodded, “Yes, try harder”.

I’d be lying if I said failing didn’t hurt. I approached my partner who was in the spectators benches, and I cried on her shoulders after trying so hard to hold back my tears when I was on the court. I kept saying “I thought it was enough”.

Contradicting after I just said I’ll try harder, but I had to let it out.

Then I thought, this is just one morning, the weekend is still long.

We have so many chances to make this a good weekend, and I’m glad I’ve seen it through!

🏅 I won a Fighting Spirit Award in the individuals!

After my shinsa, I was eager to do well in shiai. I almost cried when I lost in the quarters, especially after Rina-sensei hugged me, but the enjoyment and learnings from my last match weighed more than my sadness

🌸 Thankful to my teammates Metro G Chichay Sison Patricia Talavera! We did well despite the results. Konti pa, I know we’ll get there.

🌸 The GC that goated: the friends I made during the ASEAN Kendo Tournament in Singapore (I tagged along as their media staff)! Everyone went home with awards, and we now have a sensei in the GC 😭🙏 We weren’t complete during this day, and I hope everyone is with us next time, but I know they support us all the way

🌸 The PNKT ExeCom, I’ve seen how much you have all worked to make this event a success. Thank you so much for your hard work, and I appreciate you all for respecting my boundaries on what I only have the capacity to offer 🙇‍♀️

🌸 Our Metroken sensei Akita-sensei, Wada-sensei, Adachi-sensei, Itoh-sensei, Andre-sensei, Kuya Chenney (sensei), Allan-sensei, Ron-sensei, Rina-sensei, I appreciate all your feedback for both my shinsa and shiai. The result is absolute, and the conclusion is that I’m not there yet as of last weekend. I promise to try harder, continue training, and consistently show up until I really earn it. 🙏

🌸 To all of Metroken, who wore the club jacket with pride, thank you so much for all the appeciation and efforts in the volunteer work 🥹🙏 WE ARE SOOOOO BACK! 🔥 Congratulations everyone for bagging a total of 15 awards in all categories combined! Lalo na sa MVP natin na si Miks Lozano, you were amazing!! I’m always thankful that you always offer me a ride to and from the dojo. You play a big role on why I can always show up to practices 🙇‍♀️ and to the Metroken Board of Trustees, thank you for making sure we’re all taken care of and that Metroken runs smoothly 🙏

🌸 To my partner: who watched, recorded, and supported me throughout this weekend. Thank you so much for everything 🥹

When I flew to SG last month to support the PH Team in the AKT by covering media work, there was one question that popped in my head as I was observing and taking vids of different competitors:

will I ever love Kendo the same way as them, that when they lose, it’s enough to make even a grown man cry?

It was only now that I got my answer.

This reminded me of Tsukishima’s moment in the Karasuno vs Shiratorizawa match, where Tsuki finally understood the love for the volleyball.